Is it just me or are most fictional parents really blonde?
I’ll give it this much, it seems to happen mostly with teen protagonists. Maybe I goes along with the poor pick on teenager routine, but it’s exhausting for me to read.
I haven’t yet raised a teenager but my bonus kids are getting to that age and I can assure you that I can tell when something is off about them. Most of them time they are just emotional or mad that they have to do their choirs but still, I’m not blind.
There are two types of kids that parents have. One is the really sweet, sometimes funny, playful and happy one. The other is this really grumpy, moody one that likes to talk back and loves to try their parents until the parents are about to snap. Did I mention that these two kids are one child? Well, they are. And parents can tell which one is around.
So, I’m going to cover a few basic things that fictional parents always seem to have faults in that real-life parents- at least all the ones I have met- are also accused of.
Loving one child more than the other
I’ll admit, that yes. It does seem that each parents has their favorite kid. But as much as it seems, this isn’t necessarily true. Learning each person’s love language is key in order to better understand them- which is a real thing. The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman is a book that studies on the five different love languages of every human, explaining how that person give and receives love. It’s a great book to read to apply to your life and you learn more about human psychology, which will help make your characters seem less like cardboard because it’ll help you realize that the enemy may not be an enemy at all, but a misunderstood person trying to find love but isn’t getting it from anyone.
So, by all means, make your child character feel unloved. They can feel that too. But don’t make it seem so ridiculous as if one would be Dudley Dursley and the other Harry Potter. Don’t make your parent character favor the other one just because. Parents aren’t that shallow.
Not knowing if the child has a crush
It’s so obvious. Have you seen someone who has a crush? They are either really giggly or a major show off. Either way, they are trying to impress someone and their parents can always tell. They may not know who it is at first, but they can guess, and usually their guessing is right on target. Their kids change when they get into the crushing area of their life and the parents aren’t oblivious.
Not only that, gossip is a thing. And parents- ALL parents are included.
So, if you think you can have your teen protagonists hide that they have a boy/girlfriend while still trying to make the story seem realistic, think again. If a teen boy and girl are down in the basement doing “kid” stuff, the parent is well aware of what is really happening or what is about to happen.
One last thing in this area: do not make the father of a girl chase her boyfriend five blocks through the neighborhood the second he finds out that he is dating his daughter. The only time that this is acceptable is if the boyfriend happens to be the father’s same age and he is dating his underage daughter or the father also finds out that the boyfriend did something violating to his daughter. Or maybe if the father needs to apply to anger management.
If none of these cases apply, it just isn’t realistic! A father would not chase a semi-innocent underage boy around his whole neighborhood. If you want the father to be a complete ass about it then he can do that standing in one place, instead of acting like a teenage boy himself. There are a lot more, juicier ways for a father to reject his daughters boyfriend aside from physically beating him up.
Embarassing the child through puberty
Remember that scene in Sixteen Candles, when Sammy’s grandmother felt her breasts? Does that ever happen in real life?
Parents may joke about the changing voice, but leave the major teasing to the siblings or friends. Parents don’t find puberty that funny. If anything, they are just as nervous about it as your teen protagonists- if it’s their first time having their kid go through puberty.
If a parent where to embarass a teen protagonists while they suffered puberty, the chances are high that it was unintentional.
Not knowing when something as serious as rape happened to them
Assuming that we are strictly talking about sexual harassment at an age that your teen protagonists would know that it can be considered harassment and it was a completely new experience to them, they wouldn’t be okay for a while and their parents- being the ones that raised them since birth- would be able to tell if something was off.
It’s in the same category as having a crush, except the parents would be able to tell that something a little more traumatic happened. They aren’t that dumb and things like rape aren’t as shushed as the rapist would like. The truth always reveals itself, eventually.
Social media is the new gossip
Secrets are even harder to keep now that parents converse with other people over social media. If they paid attention- and I can assure you that at least one of the parents of your protagonist is going to (because that’s real life)- they would be aware of all the cyber bullies, all the things their kids does at parties- your protagonist might not display their party life on social media, but what about their friends?- and who your teen protagonist likes. Whether teens like it or not, parents find things out through social media.
They went through it all before
Most importantly: they were a teenager before. They once thought no one’s life was a bad as their own. They know what certain looks that teens pass to each other means. They know what happens at parties, they have met the no-good people and paid for it. They have seen it all and they know things. So, if a parent doesn’t allow your teen protagonists to do something or date someone, or even be friends with someone, have it be for a damn good reason, and no, they don’t always have to explain and they won’t. But that doesn’t mean there isn’t a damn good reason behind their decisions.
Let’s change the stereotype and be rid of mind numbing fictional parents. If you feel I have missed something comment below.
Idea Overload 